difficult times lie ahead
2005-07-18 - 9:45 p.m.
it's been quite a spring and summer.
i'm no longer teaching drumline. i didn't get rehired. a former student was hired instead. i knew it was going to happen at some point, and i had become over qualified as of this past winter. i'm just still peeved that they didn't bother to tell me until i finally got a hold of them two weeks before the start of the season, which was too late to find another job at another school.
nah, i'm not bitter.
trying to find another job is proving difficult. i'm either over qualified or not qualified enough or just not what they're looking for. i'm getting tired of sending in applications and getting nowhere. i was supposed to get a call back today after a job interview yesterday. she was going to either offer me the job or tell me i'm not what she's looking for. it's at the emergency veterinary clinic, so that would require long hard hours, overnights, and turning away and putting down animals that could have survived if their families had the money for treatment. i'd learn how to do the things required for treatment of the animals that in the long run will improve the animals' condition, but are considered foul treatment by animals, which don't understand what's going on. eventually, if the doctors thing i want to learn enough and am good enough to do so, they'd ask me to do things like assist in surgery. that's a lot of stuff to deal with. especially having to turn away sick animals that can't be afforded. i went home and slept on all of that, so i'd be able to give a yes or no when she called me today and offered me the job. but as she never called...
amadeo and i did the two-year-thing at the end of last month. we went to the lake for a couple of nights and just got away from everyone. i'm worried about us. we're both still having personal issues. it's making the relationship hard, as we don't really confide in each other when we get down. for these last two months, i just haven't felt that excitement i'm supposed to feel when i see him. i don't know why. i want it back.
i miss us.
